I simply had to take a moment to share that just now, as I was on my bed (in front of a large uncovered window that faces the road) masturbating happily and had come very close to reaching my second big orgasm, the dog started barking as he only does when someone is outside the house. As soon as I looked up, I saw two bobbing heads above the sill climbing the steps to my front door.
I calmly sat up and turned my back towards the window and took my sweet time wrapping a towel around myself, hoping to improve their day with a little injection of something decidedly unchristian. I had certainly also considered answering the door in a towel, but chose a skimpy little dress instead. By the time I got to the door, they had already walked down the driveway. They looked up at me, waved, and made like they would turn back, but they paused.
I asked, "Can I help you with something?"
Dude #1 said, "How's it going?" sounding for all the world like a frat boy and looking like one, too.
Dude #2 said, grinning awkwardly, "We're um, we're just missionaries."
Me: Oh! Well, we're all heathens here.
Dude #2: In what way? May we come share a message with you?
Me: No, I don't have time. I have spells to cast and babies to burn, all before I go back to work. But thank you! Have a nice day!
Dude #2: (Horrified) Maybe some other time then...
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